Looming

Valentine’s Day. It’s coming up.

Yeah, right, as if you hadn’t noticed, what with all the shops coming out with a “fluffy pink with hearts and chocolate” rash.

Anyway, Meg has created some wonderful anti-valentine cards that you may wish to send to your loved ones (or otherwise). I am certainly in the process of coming up with suitable recipients. Keep an eye on your mailboxes.

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I dunno

I took a test on some website where one of the questions was:

Within the past 6 months, how often did you use a seat belt when riding in or driving a car, truck or other motorized vehicle?

And the alternatives:

Rarely or not at all
Some of the time
Almost all of the time

Now, is it just me or is there a missing alternative here, as in ALL the time? I get into a car, I put on the seatbelt. This is a completely involuntary action, pure autopilot. Nevermind that we might be waiting for one of the other passengers and might sit in the car for half an hour before actually going anywhere, sitting in a car with no seatbelt on feels inherently wrong, so I just don’t.

Voice in my head: A very odd medley of “Yes, sir, I can boogie” in a squeaky girl’s voice and a scratchy Evert Taube recording of “Flickan i Havana”

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Whohoo! Friday!

1. What did you have for breakfast this morning? If you didn’t have breakfast, why not?
A pot of yogurt and some chocolate (the chocolate just happened to be there on the the table, I don’t normally have chocolate for breakfast, honestly).
2. What’s your favorite cereal?
Corn Flakes, I guess (Kellogg’s, has to be Kellogg’s).
3. How often do you eat out? Do you want that to change?
Somewhere around 3-4 times a month, and, no, that’ll do nicely, I don’t want to change it. Except I suppose if I were filthy rich I’d probably eat out more.
4. What do you plan on having for dinner tonight? Got a recipe for that?
Spagetti and crispy bacon. (Fry the bacon, which should be Swedish, smoked and very thinly sliced, to a crisp. Boil the spagetti (al dente). Drain the spagetti, then put it back in the pot and add an egg or two – stir until the egg has solidified. Serve with the crispy bacon. Yummy.)
5. What’s your favorite restaurant? Why?
The Bar of The Old Black Lion, Hay-on-Wye, Wales. The food is gorgeous. The cider they have on tap is unusual and very good. The staff is charming. The building is old and nice and cosy. Oh, and if I’m eating there it probably means I’ve spent the day browing Hay’s bookshops. Which all makes it deceptively close to heaven on earth.

Voice in my head: Whatsisface – “I Don’t Like Mondays” (oddly enough)

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Not friday, but…

1. As a child, who was your favorite superhero/heroine? Why?
Sølvpilen (“The Silver Arrow” – an indian – or native american, rather – comic-book hero). Don’t know why, exactly. He didn’t have any special powers or anything like that. Well, he seemed pretty intelligent, for a guy, which is to the good, of course. He had a pretty “girlfriend” (Månestråle – “Moonbeam”) and his best friend was a cowboy, which seemed kinda cool.

2. What was one thing you always wanted as a child but never got?
A cat. My mother is allergic to cats. Come to think of it, so am I.

3. What’s the furthest from home you’ve been?
Vancouver Island must be just about it.

4. What’s one thing you’ve always wanted to learn but haven’t yet?
Riding a motorcycle.

5. What are your plans for the weekend?
I need to do some de-cluttering this weekend. Other than that, sleep sounds like a good idea.

Voice in my head: Jon Bon Jovi singing the perennial classic Wanted, Dead or Alive

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Too busy

Too busy by far. No energy. That’s it.

Not too busy to do silly tests, though (ok, so maybe I should reevaluate my priorities).



I am, of course, none other than blank verse.
I don’t know where I’m going, yes, quite right;
And when I get there (if I ever do)
I might not recognise it. So? Your point?
Why should I have a destination set?
I’m relatively happy as I am,
And wouldn’t want to be forever aimed
Towards some future path or special goal.
It’s not to do with laziness, as such.
It’s just that one the whole I’d rather not
Be bothered – so I drift contentedly;
An underrated way of life, I find.
What Poetry Form Are You?

Which is quite good. I liked my “second best” choice, too:



I, as a clerihew,
Tend to be merry; too
Merry, it might, perhaps, by some, be claimed;
But I’m sure that these people are wrong, and need to be grievously maimed.
What Poetry Form Are You?

Voice in my head: just a constant buzz, mostly it’s the computer fans all around me, the noise magnified ever so slightly because I am tired as h***

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Public transport…

Don’t get me wrong, I wholly approve of public transport. This was just not my day…

I’ve got a meeting at Kolsås at 9:00 – about an hour later than the time I’m normally at work – which really should not present a problem, right?

Well, since I was heading for Arvika (Hi, Linda!) after work, I got the tram down to the railway station. I put my luggage in left luggage and headed for the subway. When I get to the platform, there’s a train there and on the board it says Kolsås. So I get on the train, a bit dubious, as the boards do not always tell the strict truth, but I figure I can always change… Well, I’m right, the train stops at Stortinget and goes no further. So I get off and jump on the next train, hoping this might be the advertised Kolsås line. It isn’t. I get off at Majorstuen. The train doesn’t leave. It just sits there, randomly opening and shutting doors. This is the point where I send a text message to the people I’m supposed to be meeting with to say I might be a mite late… The train leaves. Another train comes and leaves. A Kolsås line arrives. I figure I might as well get on… We get to Smestad. Announcement on the speakers to the effect that there’s a power failure on the Kolsås line further down, everyone has to get off, buses have been requested. So we all file off and stand around like lemons at the bus stop. A taxi passes, and I flag it down. I finally arrive (once the taxi driver has gotten lost once) at Kolsås, only 20 minutes late. In the guard they are four people, twice as many as normally, they spend three times the time they normally do to let me in (I’m left in the freaking cold for 15 minutes while they figure out which card to give me!!!)

That was the morning. Considering I needed to get the train to Arvika in the afternooon, I was a bit apprehensive. Surely it would not be a flawless experience?

I caught the train, I was at the platform well before time… Just before Kongsvinger – a power failure for the signals… In this part of the country a lot of roads cross the train line with nothing but signals to indicate whether a train is coming or not. The train therefore had to move at snail speed. We rached Arvika after 2:30 hours rather than the scheduled 1:45.

Not my day for public transport. Obviously.

Voice on the stereo: Someone from the Swedish Fame Academy

Oops, I did it again (I think, maybe)

I don’t think I ought to be let out without supervision. I have realised that most of the time I have no idea what sort of impression I’m making on people, and it is somewhat disconcerting when I suddenly have to face the possibility that my intentions have been completely misjudged.

Flirting is an area of human interaction that really needs a clearer set of rules and, in fact, ought to be accompanied by an explanatory leaflet. I don’t even know whether what I consider to be a decent illustration to go with the tag-line “This is me flirting” is actually perceived as flirting by anyone else. However, I do seem to get myself into trouble over this sometimes, which is why I feel the need to put some sort of a “users guide” here, so that interested parties at least have a chance at finding the information.

Just as a public service, then:

1. If I do something that can be construed as flirting recklessly with you, it means I like you and feel at ease in your company. However, it also means that there is very little chance that I am in any way interested in you “romantically”.

2. If I don’t flirt with you there are several possibilities:
A. You’re a girl (sorry, not interested apparently).
B. I don’t actually like you all that much.
C. I think you’re OK, but don’t feel enough at ease in your company, for one or more of various reasons.
D. I really, really like you.

So, how do you know if it’s 2A, 2B, 2C or 2D? Well, ok, if it’s 2A you really should be able to figure it out without my help. Unless the reason I don’t like you is that you’re thick, 2B should normally be apparent from my behaviour in general. I do try to behave civilly to people I don’t like, but I won’t go out of my way to talk to them. 2C and 2D are the tricky ones, and also the interesting ones, I guess. If there’s an obvious reason why I wouldn’t feel entirely at ease around you, should you happen to be my boss, for example, it’s most probably 2C. In fact, it’s most probably 2C in any case, I don’t have anything resembling crushes all that often. However, lets expand on 2D, as there is, obviously, a reason why I’m onto this theme right now.

I recently found myself doing the flirting thing (1). With hindsight I can point to several counterproductive effects. One, naturally, was the suspicion that the person I was flirting with might not realise how completely uninterested I need to be to be able to flirt and might, reasonably, come to a conclusion that I am interested. The other, which concerns me somewhat more, was that another person, whom I might or might not be interested in, was present and might come to the same conclusion, viz. that I am interested in the other guy and not in him.

Very messy. There’s some sort of logic in it, though: I don’t feel comfortable flirting with X because I suspect I might mean it seriously, but if Y – uncomplicated and risk-free – is present, I flirt “by proxy”.

Several other people have been present at various times, too, but they are mostly of the borderline 1/2c category (and which one can actually vary from date to day depending on how I feel and the general setting of our interaction), and so do not matter quite so much.

The reasons why I don’t flirt with people in the 2D category are really very simple. I get self-conscious. I am afraid of committing myself one way or the other until I have a firm idea of whether I am really interested or not. I don’t want to risk something that could be a great friendship by pushing ahead before I know my own mind (especially as 2D turns to 1 in the majority of cases, and I’ll always need friends more than ex-boyfriends).

While we’re on the subject: Things that would automatically exclude you from category 2D:

– you’re in a relationship already (that I know of). It’s an instant turn-off.
– you smoke cigarettes or use snuff (yuck, yuck and double-yuck).
– you’re thick, wilfully ignorant or both ignorant and arrogant (or other expansions along those lines).
– you’re shorter than me (sorry).
– you have no sense of humour.

For further details please see “21 things I want in a lover”, which is pretty descriptive.

Just to further confuse things, I do occasionally come to a potential 3, after a prolonged period of 2D. Once I have decided that I am actually interested, I may start to flirt with you after all. However, I am more likely to say something along the line of “How about it, then?”, I can be as candid as the next girl.

I will just have to hope that you’re still there when I get to that point and haven’t been discouraged beyond recall by my erratic behaviour.

Friday Five

1. What is one thing you don’t like about your body?
I’m out of shape – I need to find time to go to the gym…
2. What are two things you love about your body?
The most obvious item one is “That it’s all there and it works”, the alternative is not attractive. Item 2, well, it has it’s disadvantages, but I love being tall.
3. What are three things you want to change about your home?
I need to do the kitchen. I could do with more space (I don’t want to move, though, so it’s a rather unrealistic wish). And did I mention that I need to do the kitchen?
4. What are four books you want to read this year?
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix!!!!!!
Uhm, what else? I was planning on reading Jo Nesbø’s other books (so far I’ve only read Kakkerlakkene), and there are at least three, so that makes four…
5. What are five promises you have kept to yourself?
Tricky. I don’t normally make promises to myself. Ought I?
(I will have to think about that last one for a while – I may add something later).

Voice in my head: “I was meant for loving you, baby, you were meant for loving me!” (It’s in a nokia commericial much aired at the moment, which is why.)

Aha. Power.

I like programming. Really.

I especially like the power it gives me to decide what happens at any given time. So if I want to be random and capricious, I can.

He-he-he…

Voice on the stereo: Robbie Williams – Mack the Knife