Couldn’t resist the thursday thumb twiddler today…

1. Granville Hicks said that a censor was “a man who knows more things than he thinks you ought to.” Are there times when government censorship is necessary, beyond, perhaps, “top secret” spy stuff? Why do so many folks want to censor stuff?
There should be official boards to set age limits for movies and such, definitely, but other than that I hate censorship with a passion. Waterstones ran a wonderful series of ads for books a few years ago where one of the captions was “Nothing can be more offensive in a book than censorship” and I agree wholeheartedly. If you don’t like it shut the book/turn off the television/walk out of the theatre. The reason so many people want to censor stuff is either that they haven’t realised that there is such a thing as an “off” button on their TV or that they have problems accepting that other people think differently. Neither of which is very sympathetic, and neither of which should be encouraged by giving in.

2. Ashleigh Brilliant said, “If you can’t learn to do it well, learn to enjoy doing it badly.” What do you do badly that you nonetheless enjoy doing?
I like singing at the top of my voice. I normally only do this when I’m home alone, but sometimes I decide I don’t care what it sounds like and sing in company too.

3. Robert Heinlein’s Lazarus Long suggested, “Don’t ever become a pessimist; a pessimist is correct oftener than an optimist, but an optimist has more fun — and neither can stop the march of events.” Would you consider yourself a pessimist or an optimist? And does that ever bother you or cause you problems?
I’m an optimist. The (mostly) rational part of my brain worries, but the overall conclusion is always that “it’ll be allright”. It certainly doesn’t bother me, I agree that optimists have more fun. It doesn’t normally cause any major problems either, apart from suddenly realising at the end of the month that I have optimistically left a bill or two a bit late and now I really don’t have any money to pay them with.

You see a lot of strange things from the bus in the morning:

– a man walks towards the tram stop, opening a plastic bottle of juice, smells it and then takes a sip, as if he’d just been poured a sample of wine in a restaurant to approve the bottle. I tell myself that he probably smelt it just to check that it was ok, I mean, juice can go off, but then he does this odd little nod to himself, exactly the sort of gesture you see in someone who is telling the waiter that the wine is ok and he can get on with the pouring.

– a seagull comes in for landing on top of a lamppost, but misses it by about 5 centimetres and comes off looking very confused and flustered

– a man in a suit with a briefcase walks in the tall grass along the motorway, somewhere you’re certainly not supposed to walk, though it’s obviously possible. Problem is, about 20 metres further up the grassed ledge disappears and there’s a stretch of motorway where there are concrete barriers along the side and he will either have to turn back or walk in the rightmost lane. That’s going to be popular.

Voice in my head: Macy Gray – Relating to a Psychopath

Ooh, more lists… If anyone knows the origin of this one, please let me know.

100 movies. Bold the ones that you’ve seen.

Godfather, The (1972)
Shawshank Redemption, The (1994)
Read More

(Via Anja and Spray:) The BBC investigates the differences between men and women. Scientists have discovered only 78 genes separate us, and the public have suggested which ones. Anja concludes that she must be male, I’m not entirely sure myself, but something like this really cannot go uncommented…

– Men like to have all their stuff (DVDs, CDs, etc) on show to impress their mates. Women like to hide things in cupboards.
Whenever I hide things in cupboards I can never find it when I need it. Well, my cds are “hidden”, but that’s mainly to make space for more books.
– On being told that someone has bought a new car women usually ask what colour it is – men ask what sort is it.
I ask what sort, then what colour. What does that make me?
– Women put things on the bottom stair to take up next time she has to go upstairs. Men just step over them until told to pick them up.
Definitely male in this respect. I do eventually pick stuff up, but that’s only because there is no one else around to do it for me, and I can leave it for weeks or even months before I get around to it. In fact, I have this cd-rack thing by my door which I meant to bring down to the basement, I think it’s been there since February.
– A multi-tasking gene is clearly only owned by women – men can never prepare dinner so that everything is ready at the same time.
Neither can I, but I suspect that’s mainly because I can never remember how long the separate bits of preparation and cooking will take. I know men who can, though. However, I do not know many men who can also do something quite unrelated (like keeping up a conversation) or even somewhat related (setting the table) while still getting the food on the table.
– Men can store useless information. Like the top speed of a car they are never going to drive, let alone own.
And “Coke was invented 8 May 1886” is classified as useful information, I take it?
– Men can balance an infinite amount of rubbish in the bin, without noticing it is full.
Oh, I notice it’s full, all right. That does not mean I do anything about it.
– Men use I or me when they should use we or us. Women use we or us when they should use I or me.
I use I and me, but that might have more to do with not being in a relationship thatn anything else.
– Men refuse to pay more than £5.00 for a hair cut as it is not that important.
The three last haircuts I’ve had were done by – uhm – me. Before that, Linda cut my hair twice, for free. This is not because a haircut isn’t important, but because I can’t see any reason to pay good money for a haircut that I’m probably not going to be happy with (of all the haircuts I’ve ever paid for I can only remember to have been completely happy with 1), and this way I have at least the satisfaction of knowing it’s completely free.
– Men know that common house spiders are far less dangerous than scorpions.
Unless they have arachnophobia, that is.
– Women are the only ones with the noticing gene – we notice when something is dirty/nearly empty/out of place and then we bring into play the doing something about it now gene!
As with the rubbish – I have the noticing gene, unfortunately I seem to lack the “doing something about it now gene”.
– Men can watch an entire film without having to ask who is that, what does he do?
I’m normally the one answering those questions – if I can be bothered.
– Women know what to do when someone starts to cry. Men tend to shuffle out of the room mumbling something about doing the grouting.
I don’t shuffle out of the room, though I usually wish I could. I sit around making sympathetic noises, hoping this might help but suspecting it probably won’t.
– Girls cannot climb trees.
Now that is rubbish.
– Men have the empathy with computers gene. This means they are more likely to be found fiddling about with one rather than doing something useful.
Well…
– Women think that a good place to keep the TV controller is on top of the TV.
Do we? What would be the point in that? I mean, you’d have to get up in order to reach it, which would completely negate the point of having a remote in the first place.
– Women can get by with 10 or 20 CDs. Men need 200 plus.
I don’t think so. I haven’t counted my CDs, but there are rather a lot more than 20.

Which all just makes me want to quote Valerie Solanas, I’m obviously in that sort of mood today (or maybe I just like the quote):

The male chromosome is an incomplete female chromosome. In other words the male is a walking abortion; aborted at the gene stage. To be male is to be deficient, emotionally limited; maleness is a deficiency disease and males are emotional cripples.

Not a very complex test, but there were enough questions where I was not 100% happy with any of the answers for me to want to take it twice…

[take the test] – [by krystaljungle.com]

[take the test] – [by krystaljungle.com]

I will obviously have to try to proofread properly for the next few posts until you’ve all forgotten about those…

Voice in my head: (it’s been Moon River for most of the day, but whatsisface is obviously on a break, at least it’s now) Vonda Shepard – Hooked on a Feeling

I’ve got a major attack of reisefeber. I’ve been trying to get some organization into this trip Linda and I are supposed to be embarking on, you see.

Right, to put you in the picture, the events so far:

Sometime before Christmas:
Linda asks if I’d like to go on holiday with her this year, for a week in the summer. I, naturally, reply in the affirmative, with the provisio that we go “somwhere in the British isles” (one track mind, moi?). After a few days we decide on Ireland as the main target.

A little later:
We decide to stick to budget airlines, and figure a stop-over is a good idea what with the flight connections not being guaranteed when you fly Ryanair. One of us (can’t remember which one) starts fantasising about Flemings’ pizza, and we both agree that one night in Worthing is to be desired (we’re equally obsessed with food, one of the reasons it’s so nice going on holiday together), and that it would also be nice to see people there again and go for a pint.

March or so:
I start watching the Ryanair website to ensure we book tickets when they’re cheap. Rolf sends the calendar for this year’s sailing with Spirit of Islay and I realise they will be cruising in Scotland the week after Linda and I have planned to go to Ireland. I suggest to Linda she might have to travel back alone as I’ll want to take an extra week off and go to Scotland, she protests and says she wants to come, too.

April/May:
Norwegian announces they are starting a flight route to Stansted, just like Ryanair, but, crucially, flying out from Gardemoen rather than Torp (miles – literally – more convenient), but they don’t fly Saturdays so we’d have to alter our planned date of departure from 28 to 29 June. We decide it’s worth it, and I book tickets from Oslo to Stansted for 29 June with Norwegian and from Stansted to Shannon for 30 June with Ryanair.

17 June:
I get around to booking the B&B (The Moorings, Selden Road – it’s lovely) at Worthing for Sunday night.

23 June:
We still don’t have tickets to get back from Ireland. I finally get around to sending an e-mail to my old collegues to check whether any of them are free Sunday night. Not surprisingly I get a few negatives, however, some people are game and want to know when we’ll be arriving in Worthing. I go to check coach and train times, and realise we’ll be in Worthing at half nine at the earliest and that English pubs close at 11 on Sundays (I must have been in Norway too long when I’ve forgotten this all-important tidbit of information).

24 June:
Having slept on it and checked Ryanair again, I make an executive decision (sorry Linda, that’s what you get for leaving the bookings to me to go cycling in Öland) and book new tickets from Stansted to Shannon for 1 July. I send a mail off to Worthing asking if, perchance, some people might want to go for a pint Monday night instead…

While I have Ryanair’s attention (well, while I have the webpage up) I also book tickets for both of us from Dublin to Aberdeen for 6 July and from Glasgow to Oslo for Linda for 9 July (she has to be back for Thursday as she’s got a ridiculous number of people staying over for the Arvika festival).

You’ll notice we’re still missing:
– tickets for me to get back in time for work on 14 July
– the B&B booked for the extra night in Worthing
– any B&Bs in Ireland or Scotland
– any idea of how Linda is supposed to get to Glasgow in time for her flight

We’re also a bit wooly in our plans for what to do while we’re in Ireland. We want to go to Limerick and read limericks to each other. We’d quite like to see Cork. We’re definitely going to Dublin, well, we’re flying out from Dublin anyway but I want to see the library at Trinity and there’s an old friend of my family living there so it’d be fun to see him (I saw him last at my Christening or something like that). While in Dublin we’re going to visit Guiness.

Linda: We’re visiting Guiness, are’t we, despite the fact that none of us drink Guiness?
Me: Obviously. You can’t go to Dublin and not see the Guiness factory.
Linda: No, of course. I think there’s a law, actually, that prevents you leaving the city unless you can prove you’ve been.
Me: There probably is, and if there isn’t, there ought to be.

We also have lots of plans for just generally having a good time, and this is bound to involve a few pubs, a second-hand bookshop or two (or twenty) and some good hearty breakfasts at various B&Bs. We’ve travelled somewhat like this before, though that was in Wales, but we ended up having an absolutely lovely time, so we’re banking on it working just as well in Ireland.

Anyone with tips for things we really shouldn’t miss in Ireland, please make yourselves heard.

So, anyway, now I have a massive attack of reisefeber and the butterflies in my stomach are going wild. It really is unreasonable to expect anyone to work the last week before their holidays, how on earth is one supposed to concentrate? Come to think of it, one ought to be excempt from work the first week after the holidays, too, as one always needs at least a week to recover from all the realaxation.

Voice in my head: whatsisface – Moon River

This or that?

1. Surf sites at random, or have a set list of regular reads?
Both, I have a (fairly short) list of regular reads and in addition I normally spend some time each week popping in to random sites – sometimes I find something worth returning to, but most of the time it’s just for the variety of the thing.

2. Do you visit mostly blogs, or news or other sites?
All three – I visit a couple of blogs almost every day, I try to check at least one online newspaper every day and in addition I use the net for information gathering of all sorts (when’s the first bus to …, where was that restaurant again, which year was Yeats born and so on).

3. Do you go online every day, or just a couple of days a week?
Pretty much every day, unless I’m somewhere with little access to computers.

4. Do you allow comments on your blog, or not?
Of course I allow comments! I love comments! If you want to make me happy, leave me comments!

5. Do you shop online at all, or at regular stores?
I do a little shopping online, but only when I know specifically what I want or when it’s not available locally. I like going in to shops and actually handling things before I buy them.

6. Have you ever done online bill-paying/banking, or not?
I pay all my bills online now – why would I do anything else?

7. Which news site do you prefer… MSNBC.com or CNN.com? Or do you prefer some other one?
None of the above, certainly. I tend to use Nettavisen and other Norwegian papers, and occasionally the BBC.

8. Live chat rooms, or message boards?
Neither much, but I’m at least registered at a few message boards.

9. Instant messaging or e-mail?
I prefer e-mail, partly because I have a slow and cost-per-minute connection at home and that’s where I try to do most of my private messaging/e-mail.

10. Yes or no: have you ever met, or at least talked on the phone with, another blogger? If not, would you want to? Why or why not?
There are a few I’d like to meet, yes. I’ve met at least one, but that was before I had begun blogging myself – we had met via the internet, though.