(Via Anja and Spray:) The BBC investigates the differences between men and women. Scientists have discovered only 78 genes separate us, and the public have suggested which ones. Anja concludes that she must be male, I’m not entirely sure myself, but something like this really cannot go uncommented…
– Men like to have all their stuff (DVDs, CDs, etc) on show to impress their mates. Women like to hide things in cupboards.
Whenever I hide things in cupboards I can never find it when I need it. Well, my cds are “hidden”, but that’s mainly to make space for more books.
– On being told that someone has bought a new car women usually ask what colour it is – men ask what sort is it.
I ask what sort, then what colour. What does that make me?
– Women put things on the bottom stair to take up next time she has to go upstairs. Men just step over them until told to pick them up.
Definitely male in this respect. I do eventually pick stuff up, but that’s only because there is no one else around to do it for me, and I can leave it for weeks or even months before I get around to it. In fact, I have this cd-rack thing by my door which I meant to bring down to the basement, I think it’s been there since February.
– A multi-tasking gene is clearly only owned by women – men can never prepare dinner so that everything is ready at the same time.
Neither can I, but I suspect that’s mainly because I can never remember how long the separate bits of preparation and cooking will take. I know men who can, though. However, I do not know many men who can also do something quite unrelated (like keeping up a conversation) or even somewhat related (setting the table) while still getting the food on the table.
– Men can store useless information. Like the top speed of a car they are never going to drive, let alone own.
And “Coke was invented 8 May 1886” is classified as useful information, I take it?
– Men can balance an infinite amount of rubbish in the bin, without noticing it is full.
Oh, I notice it’s full, all right. That does not mean I do anything about it.
– Men use I or me when they should use we or us. Women use we or us when they should use I or me.
I use I and me, but that might have more to do with not being in a relationship thatn anything else.
– Men refuse to pay more than £5.00 for a hair cut as it is not that important.
The three last haircuts I’ve had were done by – uhm – me. Before that, Linda cut my hair twice, for free. This is not because a haircut isn’t important, but because I can’t see any reason to pay good money for a haircut that I’m probably not going to be happy with (of all the haircuts I’ve ever paid for I can only remember to have been completely happy with 1), and this way I have at least the satisfaction of knowing it’s completely free.
– Men know that common house spiders are far less dangerous than scorpions.
Unless they have arachnophobia, that is.
– Women are the only ones with the noticing gene – we notice when something is dirty/nearly empty/out of place and then we bring into play the doing something about it now gene!
As with the rubbish – I have the noticing gene, unfortunately I seem to lack the “doing something about it now gene”.
– Men can watch an entire film without having to ask who is that, what does he do?
I’m normally the one answering those questions – if I can be bothered.
– Women know what to do when someone starts to cry. Men tend to shuffle out of the room mumbling something about doing the grouting.
I don’t shuffle out of the room, though I usually wish I could. I sit around making sympathetic noises, hoping this might help but suspecting it probably won’t.
– Girls cannot climb trees.
Now that is rubbish.
– Men have the empathy with computers gene. This means they are more likely to be found fiddling about with one rather than doing something useful.
Well…
– Women think that a good place to keep the TV controller is on top of the TV.
Do we? What would be the point in that? I mean, you’d have to get up in order to reach it, which would completely negate the point of having a remote in the first place.
– Women can get by with 10 or 20 CDs. Men need 200 plus.
I don’t think so. I haven’t counted my CDs, but there are rather a lot more than 20.
Which all just makes me want to quote Valerie Solanas, I’m obviously in that sort of mood today (or maybe I just like the quote):
The male chromosome is an incomplete female chromosome. In other words the male is a walking abortion; aborted at the gene stage. To be male is to be deficient, emotionally limited; maleness is a deficiency disease and males are emotional cripples.